But if you get to real love in one date or one week or one year, it doesn't matter.
The end result is the same – you're totally in love.
It's still amazing love whether you recognize it when your eyes first meet or if you recognize it after dating for a while. It takes time to see that spark for what it is – and, more importantly, for what it isn't. Want to learn more about bringing bringing him in closer (instead of him pulling away)?
But if it's not already doused with gasoline, then it might take a little while to get the kindling going, then get the larger pieces burning, until finally it's that same large bonfire. But when you've had enough of everything you've been settling for in the name of that almighty spark, there’s a beautiful life and a beautiful love that’s waiting for you. Don’t be like our friend from the story and walk away from a lovely bonfire just because it started a little differently than you thought it would. Join our mailing list by clicking the button below, and I'll send you my complimentary video and E-book "4 Proven Ways to Make Him ADORE You (Like He's Never Adored Anyone Before!
But, you say, my friend met her husband and they hit it off with the spark right away, and they've been in love for 15 years and she still feels the spark!
Like I said, it can happen, it's just a coincidence. In fact, I might go as far to say that it didn't really happen.
Social dominance enhances female attraction to a male who has shown in the relationship niceness, traits of kindness and warmth stated by women looking for long-term relationships, and less status and physical attractiveness. "Nice Todd" described a "real man" as "in touch with his feelings", kind and attentive, non-macho, and interested in putting his partner's pleasure first.
Sprecher and Regan (2002) found kindness and warmth, expressiveness, openness and humor, as desirable traits of a long-term partner, less so social status indicators like future earning potential (wealth). " 54% reported a preference for "John", 18% preferred "Mike", and the rest had no preference. "Neutral Todd" described a "real man" as someone who "knows what he wants and knows how to get it", and who is good to the woman he loves.
When used positively, and particularly when used as a preference or description by someone else, it is intended to imply a male who puts the needs of others before his own, avoids confrontations, does favors, gives emotional support, tries to stay out of trouble, and generally acts nicely towards others.
In the context of a relationship, it may also refer to traits of honesty, loyalty, romanticism, courtesy, and respect.
(1995) operationalized "niceness" as prosocial behavior, which included agreeableness and altruism.
They found that female attraction was a result of an interaction of both dominance and prosocial tendency.
This study used a series of matched descriptions where each male was presented in a generous or a control version which differed only whether the man tended to help others.