Dating too soon after separation

Read on for tips that will help you get back in Cupid's good graces.

Whether it's been one year or six since the divorce decree, you may never know with absolute clarity that you're ready for another relationship.

"My rule of thumb is to meet in person within two weeks of making online contact." Might as well find out as soon as you can if the chemistry is virtual — or real.

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You're an adult, if you feel like you want to try online dating, then do it. Dating a few people doesn't mean you are about to enter a serious relationship or get married again. It wasn't supposed to be anything more than platonic friendship but feelings developed and the rest is history.

You'll either decide it's not for you and you're not ready, or you'll have some laughs and some fun and leave it at that, or you'll meet the love of your life. If you are not sure what you are looking for or what your intentions may be, make a point of keeping it fun and go on several different dates. Would it make a difference if I said it was online dating that I was considering? You'll soon know if you are really ready or not once you start. I did have a fwb situation between my ex and my current partner but he is someone I've known for many years and there are absolutely no feelings there except for a fondness for each other.

I definitely don't want to be with him or wish we were together (his lies and infidelity made sure of that! I do get sad occasionally as I never imagined life would turn out this way. I wasn't out looking for anything serious but it just kind of happened and I'm so glad.

Would it make a difference if I said it was online dating that I was considering?

) by asking by girlfriends to come out with me when I have a free night. It didn't feel too soon in my situation and I don't regret it.

The split with my ex is reasonably amicable as I believe life is to short to bear a serious grudge, and we share care of our children fairly. I've done a fair amount of Googling on this topic and can't find a definitive answer. We are 5 years in and about to have our 2nd child together so it wasn't a rebound fling either.

Or maybe I just feel like I could do with the company. I've not been that 'lonely' as such as I've got a wonderful support network of family and friends.

But most are attached and have families and I can't stretch the friendship (or their marriages! I started my current relationship about 11 months after breaking up with my ex.

Be up-front and respectful, but don't apologize for wanting to date.

"Most children just want their parent to be happy, and may be less likely to object than you imagine," she says.

Contemplating the dating scene, many divorced women feel not just garden-variety nerves, but "actual terror," says Dr. Just remember that your fears are normal — after all, you're dealing with or have dealt with a major betrayal and upheaval — and that you don't have to jump all the way in. Tell a few trusted friends that you're interested in meeting people. "Sit down and craft a statement of what, exactly, you're after. If you feel the same way, she offers this advice: "I suggest you try to reframe it as an adventure, or as an education," she says.

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