They then try to convince their spouse that his or her leaving was a mistake.
your spouse to come back or work on saving your marriage need to be set aside for a bit.
Before your spouse desires to be with you, all attempts to convince will just result in rejection. It would be like trying to convince someone to marry you who has not yet fallen in love with you.
A good guide to overcoming needy behavior is, Many people frustrate themselves after separation when their apologies, generosity, and reasoning don’t work.
They attempt to apologize for having made mistakes.
It is much easier to work on problems with a spouse who wants to have a future with you.
This is why marriage counseling is not helpful at first.
We only have control over whether we approach them or not.
Re-connection takes advantage of this subconscious process.
To be effective, you will need to make a shift in thinking from what you want to what your spouse wants.