A woman can raise all the fuss she wants, and still be considered weaker or the victim by the perpetrator.
(If he wouldn’t have considered her in a “weaker” position, he wouldn’t have tried to begin with).
It creates a swell of awareness that this behavior is more rampant than we knew. We’re half of society, and we all have to live together on this planet. The best thing men can express in this movement is a show of no tolerance for inappropriate sexual behavior.
It makes people perpetrating these crimes profoundly uncomfortable at being outed. So how are the 94% supposed to contend with the 6% who are tarnishing our gender? He hit me in the face three times before I was thrown out of the bar. Too often, too much is being ignored and dismissed as “oh, he’s just being a man” (by both women and men).
If other men, however, shun his behavior as well, the intimidation factor to the perpetrator becomes much greater.
At the very least, it takes away the feeling that other men are “on his side”, or support his behavior (silence can often be misinterpreted as support).
Something can come across either as derogatory or as a compliment. It doesn’t become a problem until it is expressed in a demeaning, controlling, threatening, or purposely disrespectful way.
I see nothing wrong with a man letting out a quick whistle, and telling a woman that she is one beautiful woman – as long as that’s where it ends. Same when men make quick remarks about how hot a woman is to each other. And it also depends on how quickly it is dismissed, and how far it goes.
The old co-worker who is an animal and human rights activist. Louisette Geiss, one of the women who accused Harvey Weinstein. I’ve never met one guy who has admitted to sexual assault. It may sound nice to think we’re going to get Derek to engage in a conversation with Brayden about the denigrating nature of catcalling, but it’s simply unrealistic. All seem distant until YOUR health care is cut or YOUR house is under water. Culture doesn’t absolve me.“Boys will be boys” doesn’t absolve me. I may not be responsible for other men, but I am responsible for my own actions and inactions.
The girl I went to summer camp with in the early ‘90s. The entertainment lawyer who danced with me at a friend’s wedding. Thanks to #Me Too, I know way too many women who have been sexually assaulted.
I’m aware why women don’t want to talk and prefer men to take up the mantle. But if women don’t talk about their sexual assaults — for their own valid reasons — it’s hard to expect men to fully understand the scope of the problem.“Placing the burden on victims and survivors to give and share their horrific traumas and mentally relive them so that other people can take and receive that knowledge, which the victims already know from personal experience is likely to be questioned, doubted, diminished, disregarded, or reacted to with defensiveness, is another ‘taking away something’ from them.”Honestly, I don’t know what to do with that. If you don’t speak out, you’re part of the problem. I remember hitting on a woman at a bar in New York City after 8 vodka tonics. I agree that there’s not much men could do to stop those who assault others sexually when it comes to talking about it.