Two other friends started dating guys they met at English lessons. And in fact, this vagueness, or “aimai” in Japanese, is a well-studied trait in Japanese communication which is designed to be somewhat ambiguous to preserve the “wa” or harmony.
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Many people will even go to English Conversation schools in the hopes of making foreign friends.
As a guy looking to meet Japanese girls who are looking to meet foreign guys though, your best bets are what are called “International Parties” and “Language Exchanges”.“International Parties” are parties organized specifically to bring foreigners and Japanese folk together and give everyone the opportunity to meet and interact in a safer environment than clubs or bars provide, and are much more relaxed events that are usually held on Friday or Saturday evenings, with some events earlier in the afternoon.
Many of the organizers also run other kinds of seasonal events as well.
You can usually find the events by doing a Google search for Tokyo international parties, with events like this popping up regularly, but it probably won’t be long before you get invited to one via Facebook.
You’ll commonly notice this with service staff who despite the rigidness of most Japanese systems rarely give you a hard “no” to any request.
They’ll often resort to saying something like, “That would be very difficult.”On the reverse side, you won’t often know when you get a real yes.
Many times it’s a lot more like a coffee date than a language exchange.